Week 1 - Read a book about marriage...

I picked the Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman because I always hear people talking about this book. I at one point found some shortened version of this book in Barnes and Noble and skimmed it but had never read this book in its entirety.

My favorite chapter was the chapter on Falling in Love.

Here are some of my favorite parts...

On real love... "It is a love that unites reason and emotion. It involves an act of the will and requires discipline, and it recognizes the need for personal growth. Our most basic emotional need is not to fall in love but to be genuinely loved by another, to know a love that grows out of reason and choice, not instinct. I need to be loved by someone who chooses to love me, who sees in me something worth loving."

On coming down from the "in love high"... "But if, once we return to the real world of human choice, we choose to be kind and generous, that is real love."

On hurtful words... "We cannot erase the past, but we can accept it as history. We can choose to live today free from the failures of yesterday. Forgiveness is not a feeling; it is a commitment."

I would say after reading this my primary love language is Words of Affirmation. It's hard to determine since I am currently living la vida single. As I said, I skimmed some shortened version of this book before and guessed what I thought my love language might be, but I was wrong. It makes sense to me now. It's definitely the way I love other people. I hold tightly to people's words and I hate idol words.

My dad gave me a card on my graduation day and I've never felt so loved as when I read his words affirming me as a success and a loved daughter. I save every note I receive. I love letters - the handwritten kind. Recently I read a letter from my best friend that I had tucked away in a drawer and I cried in my ears (this is an expression I have coined - it means you lay on your back and your tears fall in your ears, not rocket science) because I felt so, so loved and encouraged. I don't easily forget a kind word or a hurtful one.